Sunday, January 22, 2017

My Survival Guide to a House Full of Pukes

With a large family comes plenty of germs
and even more opportunities to pick them up.

Over our winter break we were sick.
Really really sick.
Here is my survival guide.
Your Welcome ;-)

Step 1: At the first sight of throw up put everyone's
hair in a bun on top of the head.
Trust me a pony tail just won't do.
It takes one second for that tail to hop in front of 
a puking person. 
Even the mom needs one!
No one likes cleaning puke out of 
someones hair at 3 am.

Step 2:No matter who is the one throwing up
get multiple buckets or trashcans lined
with lots of grocery bags. 
Pass them out like candy!
You never know who the next victim
who can't make it to the toilet will be.

Step 3: Go ahead a put a lined trashcan next to 
the toilet. You never know who will need
a toilet AND a trashcan at the same time.
Enough said!

Step 4: You know that soft rug that sits near your toilet?
Pick that bad boy up unless you are
ok with risking puke-or other bodily fluids-
ending up on that said rug.

Step 5:Go ahead and give everyone a towel
to lay on their pillow.
If they have even a little accident or
dribble you can just toss that towel in 
your mountain of laundry vs
finding another pillow.

Step 6: In regards to that mountain of laundry,
keep it going!
Otherwise you will wind up with no towels and no sheets.
No one wants to sleep on plain mattress 
while feeling like death.

Step 7: To that child who is dying for 
a "sip" of water, only to chug the 
whole cup. Puke and repeat.
Give them ice chips to suck on.
Just trust me.

Step 8:A warm bath,hot or cold washcloth,
and a heating pad are your friends.

Step 9: Make sure you have a spouse 
that can clean up the poop and puke 
that doesn't make it in the toilet.
Lord knows the sight and smell
will make you puke!

Step 10: This is important!
Keep lysol and clorox wipes
on every floor.

Lastly I would like to remind you
that if you think someone in your house
 has escaped the sickness....
think again. Chances are they
will meet you in the bathroom shortly.

I hope you find this survival guide useful:)

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