Saturday, October 31, 2020

Greg Swartz- My Grandpa

How do you actually start a blog
about losing someone that you loved dearly ?

I asked myself this question over 100 times.
I wrote some and then deleted it several times. 

My heart aches. 
Like ripped out of my chest pain
that I have not truly felt in several years.
Grief has many stages.
Each phase comes when it pleases 
and effects everyone differently.
I have cried buckets of tears.
I go back and forth with genuine shock.
I have had angry emotional fits.
All of the 'what ifs' taking up
my every thought.
If I just shouted
"I LOVE YOU"
as loud as possible would he hear me?
I wish I would have said this 
or asked him that. 
Thanked him more. 
Hugged him more.
Let him know I was grateful 
to have grown up having him in my life.
Tell him that I loved him more.

My head has been swirling.
Conversations I had with him.
Things he did.
The way he smiled.
His laugh.
His personality.
Our family memories.

In these last few weeks I have gone
through literally thousands of photos.
This man had a FULL LIFE!
He had many loving titles. 
Son-Brother-Friend-Husband-
Father-Grandpa-Great Grandpa

I am so very thankful for 
these pictures. 
Every Single one of them.


And because these pictures
have given me so much comfort, joy,
and healing, I am going to share them.
Like a ton!
Over several blogs, so get ready💖

*They are not in order*


                             
                                         











                           









                                 
                                   


                         

                                        
                                      
                           




                             







                             

                              



                             










I am so very grateful for all of these beautiful memories.
I am thankful these moments were captured 
and I am able to share them with my children.

*The next few posts will be all pictures*










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